I quit my job on Friday! I went in to Brian's office, and told him that I was quitting. I have never said this. I've said...I'm going home, I'm tired of this., but I've never said, "I quit". I hope it doesn't become a habit.

Over the last 2 weeks, 2 rumors have come back to me that just drive me nuts. The first one was that we all decided at our ministers retreat that we were "going instrumental" (sounds like "going postal"!). What do people think we do at retreats? Sit around and play "How to split the church". Good grief, is there really that much distrust. (yes Doyle, there is). Then last week, the rumor was that we were going to drop the "church of Christ" off our name. This came about after we changed our primary domain name from "southwestcofc.org" to "churchsouthwest.org". COME ON PEOPLE! I gues we brought our "how to split the church" game home with us and played it at staff meeting. Do people really think that if we had the hidden agenda of taking the cofc of our name, we would go about it by taking it off the website first. Next we'll take it off of our letter head, then our sign....THEN WE'LL TALK TO THE CHURCH ABOUT IT! How ridiculous of a plan would that be if that was even what we were talking about doing! Can you tell this ruffled my feathers a bit!

Now that I'm writing, I guess it boils down to 2 (or 5) things.
1. I hate that people I am giving my life to don't trust me.
2. I hate being misunderstood.
3. I hate being thought of as stupid.
4. I hate being "persecuted" for doing nothing wrong.
5. I hate it when people are focussed on the things that are seen around them instead of the huge spiritual battle thatis going on within us.

Wow, looking at that list....Thank you Father for giving me the opportunity to live the life of your Son. I'm such a whiner. I'm sorry. Your son got all of those things and more...you are just giving me the opportunity to be like Him. Help me love those that don't trust me to the extent of giving my life to them. Help me not worry about being understood for my sake of looking right but only seek that You be understood. Help me forgive. Help me rejoice in "persecution" for the joy set before me. Help me have pitty on those when they are seeing the seen and help me realize that in my frustration, I have become focussed on the seen right along with them. Take away my fear Father and let me just trust you. Give me wisdom in dealing with this.

I really didn't quit. Probably because nobody ever takes me serious! I just want to be Christ. I want this church to be a church that is of Christ SOOOOOOOO BAAAAAD.

Enough of that.

Tomorrow....no contacts for a week. Father, give me patience...let it be so much better than what I am expecting. I love you Father...thank you for this time in my life that you are teaching me how to be more like your son.

Doyle